Comic book creators: you should be dating more online!

Art by Jim Lee

Hey girl, I am a talented boy. Why don't you give me some money and I'll show you my chops? It'll be the ride of your life! BTW, I got this thing going on, crazy comic and shit, and nobody wants to read it. So won't you read it? Because it is making me kinda depressed and I'm feeling like the biggest loser in the world. Not sure if I'm ever gonna break through. C'mon girl, hit that follow button, I dare you! I'm gonna tell you all about me and what I am doing and just put myself out there, ya know? What, did you say something? Sorry, too busy talking about myself. You should know, I'm doing something really cool - it's just that the world is filled with morons who can't appreciate it. Why does everyone suck so much?

Would you date that guy? In a heartbeat, right?

If you're wanting more readers and followers, it might help to think about how you communicate with your audience as going on a date. You probably wouldn't show up for a date with a bunch of dead flowers and smelling like you just cleaned out a sewer pit? And hopefully, you wouldn't spend the entire time talking just about yourself and your issues, never showing any interest in what they're all about.  You know, that magic mixture of showing who you are while being genuinely interested in them, too? (A trick I'm still learning.)

If you want to engage your audience, be a top date.

Showing some interest in others - especially other creators, editors, publishers and reviewers - could make a big difference down the road. Talk about their projects in a way that shows  you understand the process - that adds value for them. If you can intelligently engage them on the topics that matter most to them, they may very well take an interest in you, too.  If you're lucky, they may even follow you or at least read your feed that one lucky time.

Next, take a shower, buy some awesome flowers, and take them to a great restaurant. Or, in comic book terms: try to create the best comic book possible and create an experience around it. Tell compelling stories - not just in the comic, but around the comic. Let folks know how you created it, what your thoughts are about the creative process. Let them know some of your adventures while creating the comic. You know, all that good stuff. Show them you are a catch.

Of course, on any good date the first thing you should do is ask them for sex.  Like, right away. Maybe even share all your kinky desires in the first 15 minutes. That'll get you a great response. Hey, why are you walking away? No, don't run. No officer, I was just talking to her, I didn't harm her. What could possibly have upset her?

Yup, it sometimes helps to develop relationships slowly, with an eye on the long-term. Slow and steady wins the race here in the comic book world. No need to start attacking your audience on every political or social view - you can engage them in this later, once you've deepened the relationship.

Of course, after a few successful dates and a great honeymoon period, nothing matters anymore. Quit that gym membership, stop taking showers and don't feel embarrassed picking your nose and farting in front of them. They know you now; you've earned their trust. Don't be afraid to leave her hanging a bit while you catch up for lost times with the boys. You've nailed it; this thing can't go wrong. Now, if I could just figure out why she's not picking up my calls anymore? Maybe she's not paying her phone bills on time? And why did her friends start avoiding me? I had this!

Yup, even when you have a deeper relationship with your audience, you've got to keep romancing them. Don't switch on the autopilot. Rather, seek to respond on a more "intimate" level. Keep it going.

And, yes, it's okay to talk about yourself. Just not all the time. And when you do talk about yourself, do it in such a way that it adds value to their lives. Make sure you communicate things that are funny, interesting and/or enriching to your audience. You are here to entertain, to move them, to help each other become better artists and craftsmen.

So yeah, when engaging with your audience, you can't go wrong asking the question, "Would this work on a date?"